Barack’s Birthday Party: Another Email from Michelle

Got another email today, this time from Michelle Obama, my favorite first lady, inviting me to donate money to be potentially considered for a ticket to Barack’s birthday party. My dreams… are coming true.

It’s basically a bunch of pandering junk, her talking about her husband’s airbrushed grey hair and how his birthday party is “one of the last opportunities he’ll get for a little downtime” before he goes golfing a bajillion times.

I especially like how Michelle says he won’t get downtime until the final weeks of the election. It appears Barack’s dear wife has forgotten he is actually ALREADY THE PRESIDENT. The pressure isn’t just picking up. He’s been president for THREE AND A HALF BLOODY YEARS MICHELLE. Combining her statement with the overwhelming footage of our president golfing, and golfing, and wandering around, and posing for photographs, and campaigning, and golfing, it seems like he hasn’t really had much down time to ACTUALLY BE THE PRESIDENT.

Perhaps he should fire Jim Messina and buy a freaking day planner. Here’s the rest of the email below. Good Grief.

Ben —

Barack turns 51 next month, and there will be a little celebration at our house in Chicago.

We’d like to give grassroots supporters an opportunity to join in the fun. You guys deserve it, and I know Barack would personally love to see you there.

Donate $3 or whatever you can today, and you’ll be automatically entered to get your name added to the guest list.

Barack’s birthday is one of the last opportunities he’ll get for a little downtime before the final weeks of the election.

That won’t stop me from teasing him about all those new gray hairs he has — though I think it’s fair to say he’s earned every one.

So if you’re standing with Barack for the final months of his final campaign, there’s no better way to show it than by making a donation to build this grassroots organization today.

If you do, you’ll be automatically entered for the chance to join him for his birthday celebration in Chicago. We’ll also fly you out and take care of all the travel arrangements.

Enter today:

https://donate.barackobama.com/Birthday

Thank you,

Michelle

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